Last 90 days, 30 days in

Last month I joined in on #last90days -- an effort that Rachel and Dave Hollis do every October -- and I'm happy to report that one month in, I'm still here for it!

The idea is to finish the last three months of the year the way most of us like to start it: working toward becoming a better version of ourselves.

Thankfully, we're not left up to our own devices on "resolutions" in these last 90 days of the year, but we're invited to join in committing to five preferred habits each morning. They call it Five to Thrive, and since I already *should* be doing most of them anyway, they're not terrible to follow.

So the Five to Thrive daily recommendations are:

1. Get up an hour earlier than you usually do and use the time for yourself.
2. Work out for at least thirty minutes.
3. Drink half of your body weight in ounces of water each day.
4. Give up one food category you know you shouldn't be eating.
5. Write down ten things you're grateful for every single day.

Admittedly, I was doing a few of these already -- namely the water and getting up an hour earlier (most days) -- and I had been working out pretty regularly, so it wasn't like jumping five hurdles at once. But having a prompt, a commitment to these five items has certainly been a game-changer.

Have I done all five things every single day?
Nope.

Do I ever go off the rails?
Obviously.

Do I feel better when I am doing these things?
Dadgummit, I DO. 

And I hate to admit that. I really do. Because please for the love of all that's good and holy believe me when I say that I want nothing.more than to lay on the couch in my PJs and eat chocolate 24/7.

But sadly, that just doesn't offer the results...endorphins...accomplishments that these blasted Five to Thrive do.

So I'll keep trucking on, here on this first day of November, and see if I can make it through the next 60-ish days (which incidentally include the holidays. Convenient, eh?).

Also, great news -- if you're interested, you can totally start today. None of us need to wait for a Monday or the first of the month or even tomorrow to start ANYthing.

Jump in! Thrive with me.

#ShareFourSomethings -- October edition

Once again, I'm joining in on Heather's Gerwing's #ShareFourSomethings -- a monthly post to share:

1. Something Loved
2. Something Said
3. Something Learned
4. Something Read

October is my most favorite of all the months, and something I loved about it this year was the time I had and intentionally took to breathe it in and really enjoy it. 

Yes, it's the month I was born in, but maybe that makes me appreciate it a little more? It probably also helps that here in the deep south, "fall" is such a foreign concept that I celebrate any change in leaves' colors -- even if that means they're dead. 

Even now, with a few days still left in the month, I'm savoring chatter about Halloween and costumes, and looking forward to the holidays with excitement.

Something that was said that is still resonating with me will probably seem small or silly to anyone else, especially anyone with different character traits. But I've been doing a lot of hard internal work during the past year or two, digging into some of the whys and hows that affect and contribute to the whats and wheres of my life. And so with that, I've come to realize some things that weren't so obvious to me before, but that are incredibly important to me now.

One of those concepts that keeps ranking higher and higher for me is being still. 

Calm. Content. Peaceful. 

These are not words commonly used to describe me. 

I'm pretty sure I've been a ball of anxiety since the day I was born, so when I ran into an acquaintance from years ago who said I "seemed very chill, so peaceful," I pretty much took it as the best compliment I could ever receive. (Thanks, J!)

Something I learned in October? How to narrow it down...there's so much. As part of the difficult internal work I mentioned above, I've been doing a lot of listening. Not just to IRL people in my world, but also to audiobooks. So in true trendsetter fashion, I finally jumped on the podcast bandwagon that's been rolling around for a decade or more now. I find that I still can't focus well if I just randomly try to listen, but if there's an author I love who only has four books and I've breezed through them, I can see if he is interviewed on any podcasts, and hear more of his communication style. (Again, breaking news on the Something Learned front, I know.)

Do you have a favorite podcast? Since I'm now in the know, I'll be taking recommendations from here on out!

Now for the really tricky one...something I read.

I love reading, and have been devouring more books  than ever lately. From inspirational to fiction, there's a lot to choose from, but I'd have to go with the autobiography co-written (and co-read, if you're into audio) by Jenna Bush Hager and Barbara Pierce Bush: Sisters First: Stories from Our Wild and Wonderful Life.

No matter what your political views are, I recommend you check this out. From stories about living in the White House to the basic human ties of sibling love and rivalry, the book is a great one. I particularly adore everything about the Bush girls relationship with their grandfather.

Did you learn, hear, love or read something in October that stood out to you? Comment here, or if writing's your thing, link up to Heather's blog with one of your own.

Happy fall!

#ShareFourSomethings -- September edition

I'm participating in my friend Heather's #ShareFourSomethings concept -- a monthly post to share Something Loved, Something Said, Something Learned, Something Read.
 
In September:
 
Something I loved was...

...getting to be with my family on my Daddy's birthday.
 
We kicked off the month with a visit to Mississippi for (and on) my dad's birthday. All the stars aligned so that everyone was off work and available to be there. Even though it was rainy, we had such a nice visit.


 
Something that was said was...
 
"...you're doing a great job."
 
Simple and to the point, no flowery language, but still so heartfelt and so very needed. I appreciate being appreciated -- and knowing that I am contributing.
 

Something I learned was...

...a little more about the Enneagram. This new-to-me personality assessment isn't rocket science by any means, but it does require some digging in, and it seems that the exploration could last forever. (I'm still not rock solid on which of the nine types I am, but I'm leaning toward nine itself.)
 
And something I read was...


...all the things Kelly Corrigan publishes.
 
I don't know why it took me a while to come across her, but her writing style is up my alley, and I love her insight on life, death and all the things in between.
 
Although I love all of her books, the first one I read is The Middle Place, and I can't get enough of it. 
 
 
If you're interested in linking up your #ShareFourSomethings post, feel free to visit Heather's blog! If you don’t have a blog, feel free to comment with your own four somethings are. We all have four somethings to share!

HIIT me baby, one more time.

I haven't wanted to put this out there (or buy new clothes) until I thought I was fully committed, but I have an announcement.

I'm no longer just donating to the gym. We are now in a relationship.

For some reason, it took trying exercise as a reprieve for anxiety for me to really get into it, and wouldn't you know -- it works! If only someone would conduct some research or write an article on this or something. ;-)

I'm limited to a certain type of bike at the gym because of a foot impediment, so really getting a good workout was taking more time and some creativity...until I tried HIIT. High-intensity interval training is not newj -- it has been around for ages -- but I just learned about it in the past year.

The idea is to alternate intense bursts of exercise with shorter periods of rest, then repeat.

The result? I definitely get a more intense workout using this method. I sweat more, my heart rate gets much higher, I'm able to burn more calories in one sitting, and I just feel the overall burn. It's like getting a better bang for your buck, without dedicating any more time to that exercise.

So how do you get started?

I'm sure there are much more structured and beneficial approaches, but I literally just searched for HIIT in the App Store and found a free timer.

The one I selected has you warm up for 10 seconds (yellow-gold timer), go at a normal rate for a certain period (green timer), then gives you a window of time to exercise at an intense rate (red timer). If you're using earbuds or want to look at something else on your phone while working out, the timer will run in the background and alert you to the next phase with a traditional kitchen timer sound. On the bike, I like to have the timer up on my screen so I can keep track of which intensity to exercise at while still focusing on audiobooks or podcasts.

Do you have experience with HIIT or other resources that might help? I'd love to hear about it!

HIIT and I have been connecting for a few months now, so I'm thinking this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

Goin’ To Carolina in my Mind: How to Help After Hurricane Florence

Hurricane Florence, photo courtesy of CNN

It’s hard to watch disaster strike and not know how to help.

When our house flooded a couple of years ago, I swore I would use the experience for good. Unfortunately, that means offering tips because others are going through one of the worst times in their lives.

If you're like me and want to help friends and family affected by Hurricane Florence but aren't sure what to do, here are a few things that helped us in the hours and days when several feet of water sat in our house, and in the weeks and months after floodwaters receded.

For people who are still in their homes and are in danger of flooding:

• Put valuables in a high place, like the top of a closet. If they have a second story, that's preferable.
• If you can get out:
  - Fill your car up with gas.
  - Park one vehicle in spot that’s higher than where your house is.
  (If you’re under curfew, stay put. Please follow your local law enforcement's rules. Seriously.)
• Put these things in a garbage bag and keep them close:
  - Important papers
  - Special pictures not on digital file
  - Jewelry
  - Electronics that would be difficult or expensive to replace, or that house your only copies of files. (I still mourn my waterlogged external hard drive with pictures from the last 15 years of life and friends and travel.)

If you know someone whose home has flooded:

• Start a GoFundMe for them. This feels odd to even type -- even after we benefited from so many people's kindness -- but whether or not your affected friends have flood insurance, being able to access funds quickly will be invaluable as the weeks and months after this weather event go by. Some people will prefer to do something "tangible," like donating some of the items listed below, but I speak from experience when I say that every $5 donation helps with insulation, paint, contractor fees, cabinet pulls, groceries...the list goes on.
  
  And the sooner the GoFundMe is active, the better. People across the country will see footage on the news and will want to help. A friend did this for us, and we are forever grateful.
• Secure a storage unit nearby that hasn't been flooded. They'll go fast once the waters recede, and if anything can be salvaged from a flooded home, it will need a place to stay during the rebuilding. Also, people who have flooded may be given furniture or may be able to purchase some, and they’ll have to put it somewhere. It's better to pay for one month and not need it than to realize you need one when none are available.

If you are nearby and can get tangible items to people whose houses have flooded, some immediate needs after the flood may be:

• Gift cards (Home Depot, Lowe's, grocery stores, restaurants - fast food and sit-down, hotels, Visa)
• Bath soap
• Shampoo/conditioner
• Hygiene products
• Laundry basket
• Non-perishable food
• Clothes (underwear, pajamas, gym clothes to gut/rebuild the house in, tennis shoes, work/school clothes, work/school shoes)

Please keep in mind that until your friends and family have settled into a temporary space, they will not have any place to store even the smallest things. The most helpful thing for us was when friends offered to hold onto our items for us, and told us to let them know when we were ready for them.

Some immediate tangible needs after the water recedes as they clean and restore their homes may be:

• Contractor-grade trash bags
• Heavy-duty work gloves
• Tools to gut their house (pull up flooring, tear out sheetrock, etc.)
• Tables to put items on that they will want to save.
  These tables may be used for a long time afterwards -- we were still using one from our church when we moved back into our house 9 months later and didn't have countertops yet!
• Ice chest(s)
• Brooms
• Shop vacuum
• Rubbermaid bins to save salvaged items
• Rake(s)
• Hand sanitizer

Please keep in mind that until your friends and family have settled into a temporary space – and maybe even after – they will not have any place to store even the smallest things. It’s so nice of people to want to give tangible things, but it’s so hard to find a place for anything when you’re in this situation.

Things that can help anyone who is affected:

• See the GoFundMe note above.
• Encourage anyone affected to keep a binder or expanding file for all documentation. It will be a long process, and they may have to move into more than one temporary space during the rebuilding. Starting out the process with that organization in place will be helpful.
• Start an Amazon wish list for them. They will have many needs over a long period of time, and it could be helpful for you to move forward with a list of basics that they can edit and populate as they have time (which could well be a month from now in between work, rebuilding a house, and other responsibilities).

#prayingforcarolina #carolinastrong

Houston, we have some solutions: How to help Texas (and Florida) after Hurricane Harvey, Hurricane Irma + the Houston flood

Survivor's guilt during hurricanes is not a new feeling for someone who grew up on the Mississippi Gulf Coast, and going through the Louisiana flood last year has given me an even more unique perspective on the images from Texas this weekend.

That experience has also given those of us who have gone through this an opportunity to share what helped us in the hours, days and weeks after the floodwaters receded.

If you're like me and want to help friends and family in Texas but aren't sure what to do, here are a few tips:

For friends still in their homes:

• Put valuables in a high place, like the top of a closet. If they have a second story, that's preferable. If they are able to leave the house, put these things in a garbage bag and keep them close:
• Important papers
• Special pictures not on digital files
• Jewelry
• Electronics that would be difficult or expensive to replace

For those whose homes have flooded:

• Start a GoFundMe for them. This feels odd to even type -- even after we benefited from so many people's kindness -- but whether or not your affected friends have flood insurance, being able to access funds quickly will be invaluable as the weeks and months after this weather event go by. Some people will prefer to do something "tangible," like the things listed below, but I speak from experience when I say that every $5 donation helps with insulation, paint, contractor fees...the list goes on. And the sooner the GoFundMe is up, the better. People across the country are seeing this footage on the news, and they want to help. A friend did this for us, and I will forever thank her.
  

• Secure a storage unit nearby that hasn't been flooded. They'll go like hotcakes, and if anything can be salvaged, they will need a place to put their belongings. Also, as they rebuild, they may be given or purchase furniture and will have to put it somewhere. It's better to pay for one month and not need it than to realize you need one and none are available.

• If you are nearby and can get tangible items to people whose houses have flooded, some immediate needs after the flood may be:
• Bath soap
• Shampoo/conditioner
• Laundry basket
• Non-perishable food 
• Clothes (underwear, pajamas, gym clothes to gut/rebuild the house in, tennis shoes, work/school clothes, work/school shoes)
• Gift cards (Home Depot, Lowe's, grocery stores, restaurants - fast food and sit-down, hotels, Visa)

Please keep in mind that until your friends and family have settled into a temporary space, they will not have any place to store even the smallest things. If you can hold onto the items for them and ask when they are ready for them, that will be most helpful.

• And some immediate needs after the water recedes as they clean and restore their homes may be:
• Contractor-grade trash bags
• Heavy-duty work gloves
• Tools to gut their house (pull up flooring, tear out sheetrock, etc.)
• Tables to put items on that they will want to save. (These tables may be used for a long time afterwards -- we were still using one from our church when we moved back into our house and didn't have countertops yet!)
• Ice chest
• Brooms
• Shop vacuum
• Rubbermaid bins to save salvaged items
• Rake
• Hand sanitizer

Please keep in mind that until your friends and family have settled into a temporary space, they will not have any place to store even the smallest things. If you can hold onto the items for them and ask when they are ready for them, that will be most helpful.

 
• Encourage them to keep a binder or expanding file for all documentation. It will be a long process, and your friends may move more than once. Starting out with that organization in place will be helpful.

• Start an Amazon wish list for them. They will have many needs over a long period of time, and going ahead and preparing a list that they can populate as they have time (which may be a month from now in between work and gutting a house and other responsibilities) will be more helpful than you know.

If you something to add to this list, please leave a comment.

Thoughts that may be running through a #FloodBrain near you

Just in case you'd like a glimpse of what's running through the mind of your coworker or friend or cousin who flooded and whose eyes look so vacant 73% of the time, here you go:

1. Ooooh! I forgot to call {fill in the blank with very important person who must be called during business hours only, Monday through Friday only, about a time-sensitive, house-related project so that we can live in our house sooner vs. later}.
   
2. I've got to get my car tag for my new car since my old one flooded. But I can't keep running errands at lunch like this. That will take hours, I know. CALGON!
   
3. Did we use the last Walmart gift card the other day? People are SO nice! We don't deserve all this.
   
4. I wonder if my gym shorts survived. Heck, I wonder if my GYM survived.
   
5. Did we really get flooded? Surreal.
   
6. I have to focus!
   
7. I'm trying. I'm really trying.
   
8. Can {insert piece of furniture} be salvaged? I've gotta figure that out this week!
   
9. FO. CUS.
   
10. Did I thank so-and-so for that nice thing? I've GOT to do that!

My coworker calls it #floodbrain. 

Best. Description. Ever.

(But we really are trying.)

Be My Guest, Be My Guest: Jill Richardson posts about An Unexpected Party!

I feel so FANCY. I have a guest blogger! But, even fancier because she's an AUTHOR. With BOOKS. Check out her guest post today, and definitely check out her party, too. (Thanks, Jill!)

Jill says:


Three years ago, I wrote a book about hobbits. And elves. And dwarves. And some pretty kick-butt women as well. Mostly, about God. It was designed as a devotional for teens, but a lot of adults have loved it, too. Here’s the back cover copy:

“Hobbits, elves, and dragons have become common fantasy characters but do they have more relevance to your life than you think? Are they as real as, or the same as, people you meet every day? Maybe not literally, but J.R.R. Tolkien's famous characters bring to life real character qualities we all can learn from, whether good or bad. What can the bravery of a hobbit, the faith of a elf, or the greed of a dragon teach teens about themselves? How can their stories lead us to the real Kingdom where God is working out way more than a fantasy for his people? Dig in to these familiar characters and relevant Bible passages to find out. Come out understanding how to live your own epic story!”

A lot has happened in three years, and the most exciting part is that teens have been coming back to the Bible through this book. Parents have emailed me with their excitement over kids who seemed to be drifting away from faith who kindled a new interest in studying their Bibles when they discovered that some of their favorite characters could be related to it. Also, they discovered they didn’t have to leave their sense of humor or their brains behind to believe the Scriptures. Amen! I have been humbled and grateful for these messages.

I’ve had the opportunity to go into schools to teach kids about literature, heroes, faith, and their place in the big story. I have met some incredibly smart, thoughtful, kind kids. They are the best.

I love Tolkien, and I love teens/young adults, and I LOVE connecting the next generation to faith. It’s been a journey — an adventure, one might say! — that I can’t wait to continue.

Thank you for the chance to share the story of Hobbits, You, and Spiritual World of Middle-earth. Below is more of the story, for those who have asked, in an Author Q&A.

I am having a party over on Facebook, and I would love it if you could join me. Come to the party, enter contests, win prizes, have fun, see weird photos, get recipes for hobbit food. What
else could anyone want? #hobbitdevo.

For those who have asked questions about the book — here is an author Q&A.

1. Why The Hobbit? What sparked your interest in Tolkien?
Hah. Years ago,my brother tried to get me to read the books. He said they were the greatest things ever. I tried first with The Silmarillion and said, “Yeah, right. Don't think so.” Can you think of a better way to bore a fifteenish-year- old girl? Fast forward to years later when my husband started to read them to our girls when they were elementary school aged. I listened, saw the first movie, then picked the books up myself and devoured them. There is something magic about Tolkien's skill mixed with real, unforgettable, and deep characters, and a story of epic good and evil fought by everyday heroes. Who else would get away with such unlikely heroes? He manages to show both the greatness and depth of evil in humankind in this small world of his.

2. Why would teenagers want to read this book?
It might seem that fictional fantasy characters don't have much in common with real teenagers.But that is so not true. They feel inadequate, afraid, angry, proud, exhausted, hopeful—all the things we all feel. Teens are looking for their adventure in life—how do they fit in this world and what is their task? In Tolkien's world, it's all about tasks and unique callings; it's about normal, average people finding their place and doing great things. How do they do it?

3. How is this book different from all the other ones out there on this topic?
Well, I have a professor who endorsed my book who said in his reply email, “When I first received your request, I thought, "No, not another one of those books! Then I read it and loved it.” So—it/s not another one of those books? Another reviewer called it “delightfully sarcastic and irreverent while deeply spiritual.” I rather like being called that.

Jill Richardson, author of
Hobbits, You and the Spiritual World

4. What's here they won't get in the book or the movie?
What is the unique Christian perspective Tolkien wrote with that may not have translated into film? Also, teens can see themselves in these characters when they study them individually. They have take home value.

5. Who is your favorite character in the book? Why?
Sooo hard to answer. I have to say I love Eowyn. I didn't at first; I thought she was too cold and discontent. But her loyalty and fierce need to do something important—I can so relate to that. Plus, she's a princess who isn't afraid to pick up a sword and fight for what matters to her. How cool is that? I love strong female models, since I have three girls.

6. Describe the process of writing each chapter.
Fun? A lot of fun. But other than that . . . I figured out what really stood out as far as a character trait or lesson for each person. Some were easy—some difficult. Then, where do you see that in the book? It was tough using only one quote! Where do you see that in Scripture? How can a person apply that Scripture to daily life? I tried to be very, very practical and fun while working with serious stuff. I think it worked.

7. What was the best moment in working on this book?
It had to be when I got the endorsement from said professor. He's a giant in the field, and I knew sending the request it was such a reach. No way I'd even make it past the gatekeepers. But I did. It felt like I'd applied to Harvard and got a scholarship. I learned a great lesson in just going for it.

8. So, the movies. Pro, con-- are you a purist or an action-adventure junkie?
Hmm. Leaning more toward the former. But not completely. The thing for me is character development. What makes a story great is what choices the character has to make and how his or her journey is followed. The first Hobbit movie did OK in that regard, but I really think the second one failed. It lost track of its focus. I don't mind additions and changes that help move things along—I LOVED the LOTR movies, changes and all. But in this last installment the main character is all but forgotten. It seems he's just sold out to a lot of video game crap I'd expect from lesser directors.

9. Why do you think Tolkien is of such enduring interest to people?
The reasons I mention in question one. People can completely relate to his characters. They are not larger than life—they are us. (Except maybe a wizard or two. They're a bit larger than we are.) They don't start out amazing—they grow into it with hard work and love. That's who we are, or who we should be. And we know that. We feel it. It's very real. Also, everyone feels intrinsically called to something important. We are constantly seeking that. Some find it—some don't. But we're pulled toward stories that speak to that.

10. Do you really own Lord of the Rings Trivial Pursuit and can you really beat anyone at it?
Short answer—yes. Thought I am a bit rusty. OK, my middle daughter and I are a pretty matched pair. But put the two of us together on a team—yeah, bring it on.

11. Tell me something more about you.
I used to teach high schoolers, and I loved it. Odd enough for you? I truly think they are a great age. I've spent ten years working in community theater, performing and directing. I have pictures of me doing so that will never see the light of Facebook. Pink hair, purple tights, giant false eyelashes? Yep, I've done it on stage. But—I'm a flaming introvert. Hugely so. I am also a pastor, which is a fun bit of mold breaking as well as serious stuff. I love my three daughters and one husband, manage our three cats, garden on an acre in the western suburbs of Chicago, and plan our next vacation as soon as we get home from the last one.

Learn more about Jill on social media, and don't forget to check out her Facebook party:

jillmrichardson.com
facebook.com/jillwrites
twitter.com/JillMarieRichar
https://www.instagram.com/jillmrichardson2/
pinterest.com/jimari/

Life Lessons from Ringo: #laflood edition.

All I ever needed to know about coping with flooding, I learned from our dog.

While Michael and I struggle daily to handle Life After The Flood physically, mentally, emotionally and financially, don't worry, because Ringo is just.fine.

With that, I bring you a few observations straight from the beagle himself:

1. Toys are not essentials. You may have loved them, they may have occupied your time, and it may make you sad to see them in yucky mud, but when it comes down to it, toys are not the end game. Love, faith, friends and family are the biggest priorities.
2. Keep your personality. Even if others know what happened to you but they treat you kindly and normally, and you react with normalcy, guess what? NEW FRIEND!
3. Find the bright side. According to my dad, my food bowls and Kong toy were "total losses" (whatever that means), but because of going all these new places, I've smelled all kinds of interesting scents, met great friends, and adjusted to new locations. Change can be good, y'all.
4. Bloom where you're planted. Since the flood, I have been in three different friends' houses and I have loved every single one. My situation has not been the same in each place, and I have had to adjust, but there's something to be happy about everywhere. Also, if people don't love
   
   me, I just keep going. MY people love me. That's what matters. Right?
5. Schedules are important, yo. Even if your house is uninhabitable, don't let anyone or anything keep you from eating and sleeping (even those pesky humans and their "priorities"). 

Ringo is always happy to add insight to life adventures, and you can often see him smiling on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. Find him using the hashtag #heyringo. 

Much love from Baton Rouge!

Beautiful, precious life.

Jen Hatmaker's For the Love:
hilarious and insightful

This time last year, I couldn't imagine life getting much better.

Disembarking from a cruise ship where Michael and I honeymooned, I immediately flew to  Austin to meet 500 of my closest friends. (So that may be an exaggeration. It was more like 200, I think.) But I really did go straight from our honeymoon, which sounds as weird now as it did then. But Michael was all for it, and it was a rare opportunity. What a way to start a marriage, right?

In the spring of 2015, my sister excitedly let me know about Jen Hatmaker's new book and a chance to be on her launch team. Pre-read the book, share quotes on social media -- this is all right up  my alley! Except I had just gotten engaged and was planning a wedding. And a purge-and-merge with Michael. And my manager was on maternity leave, so I was essentially doing two jobs.

A few of my peeps: Amanda (who just
got engaged!), Carey, and Brenna. 

With all that in mind, I let the application slide off my radar and kept at my life. Then Kim reminded me about the application during a rare moment of quietude, and I thought, all right, sure. What are the chances, anyway? So I applied.

I was pretty surprised when I was asked to be on the launch team (with 499 others - lol), but not as surprised as I continue to be that this community of women (and #bandoffour guys) are as often my sharing ground as my own family and close groups of friends.

Over the past year and a half, our relationships with each other and Jesus have strengthened as we have watched each other bloom, grieve, learn, have babies, put closure to old relationships, start new ones, put a ring on it, grow in our careers, take some scary adventures, and go through literal hail and high water...not to mention tornadoes, wildfires, and plenty of other natural and unnatural disasters.

Chatting it up. With
one of my favorite authors.
In her backyard. As we do. 

When I was looking at a job change, they prayed with and advised me through it consistently. When I (often) do the wrong thing as a newlywed and a daughter and a friend and a sister, they counsel and laugh and help me through the down days, encouraging me toward the better ones. When I need a recipe, they're my go-to! And whoever thinks speed dial is outdated in 2016 hasn't seen my iPhone Favorites list increase with #forthelove after several key names. (But obvs we text instead of calling.)

We make it a point to see each other when we're traveling through each others' towns or states. (Shout out, Michelle, Terri, Andrea!) We text before big events and outfit purchases and new makeup adventures because that's what real friends do and the fun shouldn't stop in high school. (Hey, hey Amberly.) And we comfort and console the biggest and smallest of woes, because WWJD, right? (Love y'all, Gwendolyn, Shannon.)

My girl, in our own Buda, Texas, Stars
Hollow-esque gazebo. This Ohio soul
sista, Amberly, makes me smile daily.

One year ago today, some of us were able to meet in person at the author's house, but even that nice little time wasn't the real peak of this group.

These people, whom I met because we all love God and like to have fun, have become quite the community of fashion advisers, exercise coaches, relationship therapists, prayer warriors, meme extraordinaires, keepers of the hashtags, prompters to write better, and so much more. The best part is, they love my husband and dog as much (or more than!) they love me. How's that for amazing?

Now, a year into marriage and three weeks after a historic flood ruined the majority of our belongings, I can't imagine life getting much better.

Sure, the Maricellis of Baton Rouge have seen calmer days, and we have certainly had more to our names than we do at present. But along with our in-real-life church, families and friends, both Michael and I could not be more grateful for the launch team, #the500, this community. We have experienced support and love from total strangers long before this devastating event, but since then, even when the future is uncertain, the love has been astounding.

I am grateful to get to do life with these women and #bandoffour men, and I am proud that they are part of my beautiful, precious life.

(And obviously, I fully acknowledge to my sister: you were right. Always!)

Save it for a rainy day: How #Groupon is helping us in the #laflood

Disclaimer: This is a sponsored post. All opinions are mine.

While you can't save and hold value of a coupon (or Groupon) forever, you can certainly purchase and redeem a Groupon in times of need, which help with the financial burden and peace of mind for both you and your house.

Currently, I'm sitting in Not My Own House, at Not My Own Address, and am at heightened awareness about any money I spend (thanks, #laflood!). And because of how the unprecedented weather and subsequent effects in Baton Rouge in the past few weeks have impacted my family, I find myself trying to save pennies and nickels and dollars now more than ever.

But thanks to Groupon, even though our house flooded recently, we have been able to indulge in some creature comforts and replacements such as these Groupon Goods without needing to spend additional money, which is a tremendously huge relief.

And, also thanks to Groupon, we can treat ourselves to eating out occasionally by having an indulgence and feeling normal while not being so limited as we were before all this.

It's been a nice reprieve to the shock.

I've been Grouponing for years. The Louisiana flood may be a rare occurrence, but saving money is vital and necessary in real life, especially in times of crisis.

#Katrina11 + #laflood = brand new perspective

Biloxi, before and after 

Hurricane Katrina.

Eleven years ago today, Hurricane Katrina changed the landscape of the Mississippi Gulf Coast where I grew up.

As tragic as that day, the months and years to follow have been, I didn't think I could feel any more strongly about personal belongings being destroyed than I did in 2005.

I thought, "You know, I'm FROM the coast. I get the sense of loss. I'm as close as you can come to being the one who actually lost everything."

And maybe I was. Maybe. 

Or maybe I didn't realize that while being away and not being able to help in the ways I wanted pained me, just as a picture of a destroyed landscape doesn't show a 360 degree view, nor does not living in it.

Panoramic view from our driveway in Baton Rouge, 

taken this evening.

Maybe I kind of missed out on the fact that driving past debris piles daily wears on you. Seeing others' belongings sitting on their street is saddening in ways you can't describe. And hearing about diggers climbing on debris mounds is both infuriating and heartbreaking at the same time.

And there's no maybe about this one -- I certainly didn't think about the toll a mass displacement takes on hosts and hostesses during this type of crisis. "Yes, please come into my home. I want to make you feel welcome. What can I do to help you?" And then silently, surely, "How long will this last again? They're nice, but...my family needs some normalcy, man." 

Then the guilt. Everyone involved feels the guilt.

Those of us who went through it wonder what we could've done better, how we could've been proactive.

Those of us not present to help want to be there to help, even when there's nothing tangible to do, and maybe even nowhere to stay while we do the nothing that's so important for us to feel like we're doing. (This was 100% me in Katrina while I was three hours' north of my family, by the way.)

Those of us present bend over backwards to help however we can. Laundry? Dishes? A place to hang out? A meal? My home? A ride to work?

It's all over the top, and we are over the top, and our emotional barometers are full before we can ever brush our teeth in the mornings.

Each anniversary of Katrina, I reminisce on my beautiful upbringing and all the places and faces I call "home."

This year is different.

This year I'm empathizing with Nan, and all the times I offered to give her something -- you know, a basic, like a nail file, and she replied with, "Well honey, I used t'have SEVEN of 'em, but now I guess they're FLOATIN' in th' GULF a' MEXICO."

This year I'm thinking about my Mother, and her multiple washings of Nan's and others' clothes to make sure they got that "Katrina smell" out and saved the saveable clothes from ruining. (God BLESS laundry and dish washing angels!)

This year I'm thinking about Pop Ball, who diligently worked at contacting FEMA and filing insurance claims and making repairs like it was his job, and I'm thankful for a husband that is doing the same, on top of his own full-time job, plus spraying the house nightly for mold and sorting through clothes as we organize ourselves in another new place.

This year I'm thinking about the many who hosted families like my own little Maricelli bunch of Baton Rouge in their homes when they were displaced by that storm.

This year I'm thinking of all the power outages, which I am thankful we are not dealing with, and all the nasty heat on the Mississippi Gulf Coast in August '05 and in Baton Rouge in August '16, and how we are all getting so much sun, but not in an ideal way.

This year, on the anniversary of the storm that changed the landscape of my upbringing, I'm thinking about the first 18-wheelers I saw coming into Baton Rouge post-flood, and how they were all from my Mississippi Gulf Coast. And the first of still ongoing Red Cross trucks that delivered meals to my neighborhood, and how they were from my Mississippi Gulf Coast, too.

No, this memory and day aren't all about what we went through in Baton Rouge, but I'm experiencing a different sort of commemoration of Hurricane Katrina, and it's all because of the flood we just experienced and, though we [read: me] are terrified, we have been shown enormous kindnesses.

Mainly, I'm keenly aware that while eleven years ago today Hurricane Katrina changed the landscape of where I grew up, and that while two weeks ago a flood changed the landscape of my present life, I am from a resilient people, and a pattern has been set to overcome tragedy. Michael and I will not just survive; we will thrive.

Our perspective may have changed, but our resolve has only strengthened.

Of all the beliefs that remain unchanged, though, there's this: good riddance, Katrina.

Unprecedented: How the Louisiana Flood Seeped Into Our City, Home and Hearts

Unprecedented.

That's the word I kept seeing to describe the flood waters and the back flow that crept into Baton Rouge last weekend, turning my sweet, fun-loving city into a crest of the unknown, and then into a smelly row of debris piles.

Once meteorologists and city officials led us with the term, it became a key word around here:

We've had an unprecedented amount of rainfall...

The parish and surrounding areas are seeing an unprecedented amount of flooding...

This crisis is, aside from hurricanes, completely unprecedented for the state of Louisiana...



Our neighborhood, when we came home
Sunday after evacuating Saturday night.
I took this picture and am standing at the
street corner, about 8 houses from ours.
The guys you see are our friend Scott and
Michael, waist-deep in water. They have
just been to our house for the first time.

When my husband and I got back to our home of one year and one week the day after we evacuated, we saw that the meteorologists and city officials were right: this flooding and back flow were, indeed, unprecedented.

Parking at least a mile away, we passed tired, tearstained, sunburned faces pushing children in Target shopping carts and knew we had made the right decision to leave the night before. What we couldn't have imagined was that our home, some forty feet above sea level, could have taken water. After passing boats still rescuing our neighbors and wading through knee- and hip-deep water into our subdivision, we learned that not only was water in our house, it was in it nearly two feet high.

Thankful for the gracious friends who had insisted we come to their house but still fearful of the unknown, we waited two days for the water to recede. Once it did, we faced the devastating truth that our area, once laughed at for no flood insurance due to its high elevation, was now sitting in two to four feet of water.

Unprecedented, indeed.

Half of our neighborhood looked like our house. Much of Baton Rouge is the same. The stench, we fear, will never leave our noses.

The two quiet towns east of us, Denham Springs and Walker, and a lovely town northwest of us, Zachary, are badly damaged. No one we know doesn't have some kind of story about someone losing everything.

For Baton Rouge, that is unprecedented.

But also unprecedented, we noticed immediately, were the calls, texts, Facebook messages, and outreaches to us and our families on our behalf checking on us. People drove by our house, trying to see if we were all right and offering assistance. One of our best friends came right away, and seeing our shell shocked faces, whipped up a team from our church to help clean up the debris the next day. She also insisted on setting up a Go Fund Me account for us, and secured our storage unit.

The same friends who are housing us didn't ask, but prepared meals for us every day and night, and could not if they tried ever make us feel more at home. Their son, our ring bearer just a year and a week before, greets us every time we walk in with an enthusiastic, "Hey Michael! Hey Rebekah! Hey Ringo!"

Probably most unprecedented for me is the way I see our neighborhood coming together. The night before the flooding, when Michael was checking the drainage ditch every 30 minutes, he would mention, "Rick said so-and-so" or "Robbie mentioned this," and I was all, "Um, is that the neighbor?" Today, to quote Nan, I would know our whole street if I saw 'em on th' big road, hon-ey. I think that's how it's supposed to be. But still, it's unprecedented.

The majority of our things are in a pile on our street. I know that's not the most important thing in life; the most important thing is that we are safe and healthy and together. But the furniture that Michael's granddad made and the things Nan gave me can never be replaced, and so we grieve because while those things are just things, they are our things that are precious to us.

We have just been married a year, so many of our registry items were nearly brand new. Those were just things, but we picked them out together to start our life together, and they are ruined, and it was kind of sad to throw them on the heaping pile of soggy trash in front of our once nice and neat neighborhood.

All of this, for us, is certainly unprecedented.

But also unprecedented is the overwhelming compassion we feel for one another. I am more protective of this man I married than I ever dreamed possible. I have butterflies like I did when we said "I love you" and got engaged and got married, only they've grown. Maybe they're more advanced butterflies now? I'm not sure. Unprecedented, certainly.

We are absolutely blown away by our church, and The Church. The sheer love we have seen from our friends, family, church family and people who don't even know us is just, well, overwhelming. As Michael said to me on like Day 2, "You know these people love Jesus, but when you see them doing for you what He would do for you, it's just a completely different chapter of the story."

And he's right. It is. It is an unprecedented love we've been shown.

It has only been eight days since the Louisiana flood seeped into our city, and our home, and our hearts. And while it's going to be quite a journey without flood insurance, we are forever grateful for this unprecedented love we are encountering.

One thing is for sure: the circle will certainly not be broken. We will pay this unprecedented kindness forward.

 https://www.gofundme.com/becomingmaricelli

For Budget or For Worse: Why I Groupon.

disclosure: this is a sponsored post. all opinions are mine.

Embarrassingly enough to admit, for me, with marriage came an actual strict budget. I know -- I should have been doing this well beforehand, but the fact is that I wasn't. And another fact is that budgeting has helped me tremendously. (I'm sure it doesn't hurt that I married an amazing numbers person, but balance is likely another post altogether.)

Thankfully, I knew about Groupon coupons long before meeting the Budgeter in my life. Whether I want to buy quality, high thread count sheets at a huge discount, or a manicure and pedicure at my favorite salon for half the normal cost, or a fantastic bargain from the greatest beauty retailer of all time, signing up for Groupon emails is the way to do it!

At first I was leery about getting yet another email in my inbox each day – is saving money really worth it? – but then I realized I could actually exercise some discipline and filter the emails coming through each day, just like I do with other company’s communications.

If I don’t need what’s being offered, I can delete the email. But if I’m in the market for candles, or a gift, or new workout clothes, or a 50% off deal to the best Thai restaurant in town, I can use my allotted budget for that and take Groupon up on their offer.

Maybe you want to, too? It's fun!