Sunday, July 27, 2008


Last week I was violated.

It seems weird to type that -- much less say it out loud -- but it's true. Of course, it couldn't come in some average, run-of-the mill way. It had to happen through a method that's basically unheard of, but I learned that the whole process makes you feel...bizarre, to say the least.

It all began when I started my car Monday. To my horror, the little white cotton puff sounded exactly like a Harley. I took it to a shop, only to learn the next day that my catalytic converter had been cut out and stolen. Apparently, there is a hot (pun intended) resale market due to the platinum in catalytic converters. According to my insurance company, this trend was very popular in northern states but limited to that region until the crackpot experts at 20/20 did a special on it. Then it caught on around other parts of the country as well. With my luck, of course Louisiana is a hot spot for it right now, and of course the less-than-a-year-long resident gets hit. After, I might add, moving from one of the nation's top crime cities and having never been a victim. Nice.

I think it's important to note that my car had been parked at work over the weekend -- which is located in a very nice part of Baton Rouge, similar to Ridgeland's new Renaissance area, for those who live in Jackson -- and as my daddy pointed out, the theive(s) had probably noticed a trend in my occasionally leaving it there overnight when I travel for work and use bank cars. So it's not like my car was in a bad part of town when this happened.

But back to the violation... Before I realized that my comprehensive deductible was so low on my insurance (IDK why, but I am now thankful it was!), the car shop called to say my violators had ruined my tailpipe and muffler when they took my catalytic converter. Of course, that meant more expense, more repair time, more frustration.

Around this time, other things started occurring as well. My cell phone rang with a call from an 800 number. I figured it was a telemarketer, but had already racked up so many voicemails that day that I knew I didn't want to listen to another one, so I took the call, which went like this:

RJ: Hello?
Caller: Hi, this is so-and-so from AT&T Wireless.
RJ: Hi....
Caller: Miss Johnson, this is a courtesy call. We've noticed that your bill is unusually high and wanted to see if you've been making many out-of-country calls from your cell phone?

Well, of course I had not, but wasn't that just the sweetest thing to hear, especially right then?

Five phone calls later (AT&T Wireless may have great customer service reps if they call you to point out something like that, but I learned they cannot transfer you to the person who can fix the problem worth a flip), I was finally speaking to someone who could fix the error. And when they figured out what the error was, don't worry, because the genius who switched me to my new 225 number gave me NO PLAN AT ALL. That's right - for the last two months, every time I have LOOKED at my phone (much less texted, placed or took a call from it), I have been charged out the nose. Of course, the customer service rep wanted me to tell her what plan I was on, when I had been with AT&T forever, through several company changes, and had probably had the same plan for at least five years. Ugh. When the error was finally corrected, I was credited more than $1,000.

The hits kept rolling from there - documents I had worked on for weeks were suddenly corrupt with no changes saved, things around me started breaking, the guy from the car shop who gave me a ride back to my repaired car was overly chatty, I caught every train in Baton Rouge every time I drove, etc. I tried to chalk it up to a full moon, but I must say, it was one tough week. Each evening I drug myself home and locked my doors, thinking it wise to put myself on house arrest. But of course, I learned a lot from my weird experiences, including (but not limited to):

  • Cars have catalytic converters.
  • Catalytic converters need their own alarms.
  • Getting a new haircut before a weird week is essential to a girl's self-esteem and self-preservation.
  • I should time my vacations to align with Liz's so I don't have to worry about not venting to her while she's having the time of her life.
  • Contrary to the way the world should work, bad things can happen during my sweet sister's birthday week.
  • Having a boyfriend and family who understand when you're all talked out is priceless. And essential.
  • God bless Angela, Shannon, and our penchants for getaway lunches.
  • Not having a cell phone plan is the silliest thing anyone could ever do.
  • Thieves watch 20/20.
  • I am good for nothing during a week like I just had!

TGIF took on a whole new meaning last Friday.


Wow. It's just Unbelievable how things seem to occur in a series of events... never just one little thing... an entire string of little things. I hope this weekend has proven to make it all better for you.This made me think of a quote I came across this morning:>Murphy's Law<"The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet."
Posted by Çhr阮ïñå on July 27, 2008 - Sunday - 5:23 PM [Reply to this] [Remove] [Block User]

the good news is you have a roof over your head...there were times in my life when i didnt! they took your catalytic converter not your car! as for your cell phone... its a damn shame they couldnt see how great you looked, with hot hair, while you freaked on the service call you had to make!~!!!!!!!!!!! lol i love you
Posted by Dyanne on July 27, 2008 - Sunday - 7:53 PM [Reply to this] [Remove] [Block User]

Okay, that is the week from H***. I hope that this week is going much better for you. After reading your blog, I think I'm going to go out and get an alarm for my catalytic converter (whatever the heck that is!). Also, just FYI, I love the bread quote from above! I'm adding it to my favorite quotes right beside Charlie Brown! Happy Brand New Week!
Posted by Amanda on July 29, 2008 - Tuesday - 9:48 AM [Reply to this] [Remove] [Block User]

.........BUDLIGHT PRESENTS.... REAL....Men of GENIUS...Today We Salute you, Mr. Catalytic-Converter-Platinum-Ripper-Offer Guy....- - (Mr. C-C-P-R-O-Guyyyy!!)Your Pit Crew speed and ingenuity, combined with up-to-date intel from 20/20 have resulted in the latest Feng Shui in urban crime(...We're-really-fast-like-Ninjas....)First; Copper..... Then it was lead.... Now Industrial grade platinum.... Your stealth-like automotive-mining skills place you on the top rung of the Can-Man's corporate ladder(I-Really-Need-Bail-Money)So Crack Open an Ice Cold Bud Light... Metallurgist-Of-The-Muffler......Because We know as long as we have catalytic converters..... You'll ALWAYS stink......In our book...(- - Mr. C-C-P-R-O-Guyyyy!!)
Posted by Jammit on July 31, 2008 - Thursday - 1:51 PM [Reply to this] [Remove] [Block User]

WOW omg what a week!

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