Thursday, October 8, 2009

I have a dream.

Every night -- several times a night.

And as far as I can tell, I remember ALL of them.

And here lately, I'm about sick of it.

I'm not saying I'm anything akin to a Biblical character, but in the past few weeks, I'm starting to wonder if I don't need a dream interpreter.

My dreams have always been odd -- always. But lately, they leave me feeling unrested and unhappy with myself when I wake up. UN. ACC. EPT. A. BLE. Completely unacceptable!

Off the top of my head (no pun intended), my recent dreams have included:

  • My being on my way to prison (for what, I'm not clear on).

  • My parents being disappointed in me for not having children (which, to their credit, they never harass me about, so it's a really odd dream).

  • Working again for a former boss (from a lifetime ago) who was uber-critical, and who said he was still let down that I wasn't following his advice from the year 2000.

  • My being on the "Lost" island (pretty sure I know where that one stems from, since I got hooked on the show while I was out with strep).

  • Plans I've made being very messed up (orders not coming in correctly, things going awry, etc.).

And the list goes on.

I've always had a bit of a guilt complex in general (even though if you know my sister, you're aware that mine pales to almost transparent in comparison), but good HEAVENS. Waking up every morning feeling bad about myself is RIDICULOUS.

I would say I need a vacation, but as I told some friends earlier this week (or was it last week?), every vacay I've taken lately has resurfaced some very unwanted and tangible ghosts from the past. So, no thanks.

I never thought I'd say this, but I might be ready for my "normal" dreams -- where everyone from all stages of my life are hanging out, but we're all Smurf blue. Or friends from a certain time period have a reunion...with paintball a department store.

But these current dreams -- how to fix them?

Is there an app for that?

Or, at the very least, an herb?

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